Howie Behrens

Musician - Other
Jersey Village High School c/o 1988

Guitarist for Push Monkey

Biography

Howard "Howie" Winthorp Beherens was a quiet child growing up in Emmottville Texas. Early accounts about his childhood from family members often refer to Howie as "flaxen boy wonder" or "Tarzan". You see, Howie is and always has been "one" with nature. Growing up in the country exposed Howie to the dark mysteries of nature. He would often spend his days fishing, bow hunting or playing with his pet raccoon "Stymie". Howie's parents recognized early on that their son's strong bond with nature needed to be channeled into something constructive, otherwise, Howie was on the path to being no more than one of those crazy ass hosts on the Discovery channel. You know, the ones that pick up a snake and say, "this is the deadliest snake in the world. One molecule of this venom will make your hoo-ha fall off. Let's see if we can't wake up this fella". Stricken with fear, Howie's parents enrolled him in Boy Scouts.

If there was an achievement badge for it, Howie earned it. The Boy Scouts of America even had to create a few badges for Howie. Without Howie there would be no Beaver Run badge or the ever so hard to get Early Morning Totem Pole badge. The scouts have a day every year where you emulate someone you admire. Since Howie was just starting to get into music, he thought he would dress as the famous nature loving wild man Ted Nugent. Howie decided to make a grand entrance at the evening's celebratory dinner. Dressed in his loincloth, Howie swung from a vine with his crossbow slug across his back. As bad luck would have it, his loincloth got caught on some mesquite bushes, sending it dancing across the air like a paper airplane. That was the day that Troupe 1169 got an eye full. It also was the day the scoutmaster asked Howie to leave the troupe. Devastated, Howie did the only thing that made him feel better. He went home, turned up Ratt's new album "Out of the Cellar" and learned how to play that record note for note.

Year's later in high school, Howie dabbled in a rock band with fellow classmate Darwin Keys. The band was formed with the intent to compete in a Church sponsored battle of the bands. Each band had a two song set list. Howie and Darwin's band chose to play covers of "Soul Man" by Sam and Dave and "Wishing Well" by Terence Trent D'arby. A creative difference between the bass player and one of the trumpet players was the straw that broke the camel's back and the band would never once play out live. All was not lost on this experiment because it would be years later when Howie would remember Darwin's ability to do the splits like Terence Trent D'arby thus causing the recruitment process for Mr. Keys.

Howie actually had a big dilemma on his hands the month before Darwin was to join the band. Drawing from his talent as a youngster coupled with his knack for strategy, Howie was scouted by the Army and was offered training as a nuclear scientist. Howie was at a crossroads so to speak. Would he take the prestige of a high-ranking military job, or would he start the up hill battle of making the big time? Knowing just what to do, Howie put on his loincloth and headed to the woods. There he sat in the lotus position, one with nature until he had a vision of himself without his shirt on with long flowing blond hair that was wet with sweat. He was playing in Pushmonkey to thousands of fans and out in the audience was his scoutmaster. Their eyes met and Howie could see the regret his scoutmaster carried. He had his answer. Howie would set out to be the shirtless wild man of Pushmonkey and prove all doubters wrong. Now if he would have just saved that loincloth for E-bay